& Simplicity ♥

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♥tha's blog
http://thisismystorybytha.blogspot.com/
copyright since 2008
created by: gitachristy

♥because the gift of life is the life itself
♥and being you is the greatest gift of all♥

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did I make a right choice?

Being a single child is never an easy task for me. There are a lot of things for me to do,and I can't fail,since I'm "the inly hope" in my family. It's hard for me sometimes,the pressure is too intense,people demand a lot from me. Sometimes I feel not good enough for my parents. Well,I'm not saying that I'm an useless child in the family. In fact, I did some competitions,I did some stuffs,that I'd say can make my parents proud of me. My biggest achievement,mmm,maybe I can say,went to college at age 16. Some people were surprised when they heard I'm still 17 now,and already in college,even though I think there's nothing special from it. But yeah,they sound like it's a big deal for them. And right now,I'm kinda missing my "old" life,I'm mising my "old me". I don't know why nowadays,I feel like I just wanna turn back time,and go back to the past. If I look back,my past was so happy. I was more cheerful than now,I smiled and laughed more. I used to have what I call perfect life:family who loves me so much,boyfriend who loves me for who I am,friends who always been there for me,and I lived in a really good environment. Everything seemed so perfect,too good to be true,and I was already spoiled by it. It all changed when I came to US,and now,I'm kinda regreting my decision to came here and study. My stupid decision,that ruined everything in my "so-called-perfect-life",and turns out my life became "so-called-hell-life". Yeah,everything's changed,everything's different,and I sometimes feel left by my friends. We live in different worlds right now,basically. It hurts me at the very first time,cuz I never feel left alone before. Then I broke up,everything's changed. I shielded myself from any other guys,which I don't know why. And I even missed a chance for something that probably can make my life into a better situation now. My life has turned out to be a miserable life. Well,even I realize that I do have those people who care for me,and I even be said like a person who always have friends around her,and the person who always cheerful. And sometimes it's hard for me to be like that. I can't always be cheerful,and always surrounded by friends. I had my heart broken,many times,by those people that I care about. I don't know how am I gonna survive throughout this life. Now I'm questioning myself,and my decision to came here,did I make a right choice?

You're all I ever wanted ;